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Dear
Louise
By
Louise Hay
Louise L. Hay is a metaphysical teacher and the bestselling author
of 27 books, including You Can Heal Your Life, Empowering
Women, and Inner Wisdom. Since beginning
her career as a Science of Mind minister in 1981, she has assisted
thousands of people in  discovering
and using the full potential of their own creative powers for
personal growth and self-healing. Louise's works have been
translated into 25 different languages in 33 countries throughout
the world.
Dear Louise,
I'm 45 and have struggled with depression since childhood.
Although from outside appearances it would appear that I had an
idyllic childhood, behind the scenes I had a dysfunctional family
with alcoholism on both sides.
I have one older sister who's very successful and has always
been favored. Other family members have recognized this, but she
(my sister) says she doesn't. She has a completely different
relationship with my parents than I do. She's married with
a child of her own; I'm single and very much alone except
for my two cats, and live in the house that my mother bought for
me four years ago, which is supposedly mine although my name is
nowhere on the deed.
Because of my depression (and other ailments including lupus)
I haven't worked steadily, so I rely on my parents for money.
I feel that I need to speak my truth. If you’re able to
shed any light on my situation, I'd be most grateful.
– F.S ., Portland, ME
Dear F.S.,
I feel that you're stuck in the past. Your mind goes over
and over the old experiences, and you don't allow yourself
to see a bright future. As hopeless as your situation feels, it's
really only your own thoughts that you're dealing with. As
you choose to change your thinking, your whole life will respond.
There's a part of you that wants to remain the helpless child,
and you want your parents to give you the love and affection that
you were denied back then. The trouble with remaining a victim
is that you give all your own power away. As a child, you didn't
have much choice, but now you're an adult, and no one can
think in your mind but you. You're not a victim unless you
choose to believe you are.
The depression (hopeless anger) and the other ailments will all
disappear when you're willing to stop wanting to punish your
parents for the past. Forgive, forgive, forgive, and then forgive
some more. Forgiveness is not for them, it's for you. So stop
thinking about the past. Keep your thoughts in the now, today,
in this moment.
Affirm: I AM THE LOVING PARENT I SEEK, AND I TAKE LOVING CARE
OF MY INNER CHILD.
Dear Louise,
I'm so blessed with two beautiful girls and everything else
in my life. Miracle after miracle happens every day. But I'm
still struggling with alcohol addiction, and I can't completely
understand its cause. At the very moment when I feel strong and
believe it's behind me, I'm tempted so strongly that I
can't deal with it. The period of time between these temptations
is longer and longer every time, and the response of my body is
worse every time. I'm still drinking and abusing myself. I
thought I could handle it on my own, but I can't. Thank God
that I know I need help.
– C.I., Chicago, IL
Dear C.I.,
You're not alone. Many people struggle with this same problem,
which is why Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) was born - to help people
like you who want to put an end to their internal conflict. They're
the experts in this field and will be able to help you understand
the origins of your addiction and how to find the solution. Contact
an AA group in your area immediately!
It's an act of loving yourself to reach out like this. I know
that you can move away from your thoughts of the past and create
the bright future that you deserve.
Affirm: THE ANSWER IS AT HAND, AND I AM FREE OF THE PAST. ALL
IS WELL!
Dear Louise,
I seem to be in a rut in my life right now. I'm very attracted
to this older man who comes in where I work. Just seeing him seems
to make the day go by better, but we both have a spouse. Why do
I want this man? I know it's wrong to lust after him.
– M.P. Detroit, MI
Dear M.P.,
Yes, you're in a rut, and a most useless one at that. It's
a total waste of your precious thoughts to obsess about a customer
like this. It can't possibly create any good in your life.
Your thoughts are your most valuable tools. Every thought you
think is creating your future – which is why you need to
continually monitor your thinking. Think of your thoughts like
a paintbrush on a canvas. What is the picture you're creating?
Is it muddied and confusing, or is it clear and beautiful? Choose
thoughts that make you feel good. Thoughts of gratitude and appreciation
bring you many more experiences to be grateful for. Love the life
you have now, and know that that love will expand to include more
good than you can even imagine. The Law of Attraction is always
operating. Be joyous, and more and more joy will enter your life.
Affirm: I AM SO PLEASED WITH MY LIFE NOW, AND I KNOW THAT IT WILL
ONLY GET BETTER AND BETTER.
Please
send your questions to:
Dear Louise Column, c/o Hay House, Inc., P.O. Box 5100, Carlsbad,
CA 92018-5100, or e-mail your letter to: admin@hayhouse.com
(letters may be edited for length and clarity).
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Dear
Louise 