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For
instance, if someone has cheated you, is it revenge or fairness that
you really want? Desiring vengeance doesn't solve the problem;
it just punishes. Desiring fairness, creates what you really want,
which is being treated truthfully and equitably. Desiring fairness
creates safety, while desiring revenge does not. Desiring fairness
requires unlimited thinking, while wanting revenge assumes that fairness
is impossible to attain.
What, then, can each of us do to make the most of our desires?
The answer lies in asking: “What do I really want to happen,
if anything in the whole world were possible?” That question
asks us to really look at what we yearn for.
To illustrate, if we want a cheating person to be punished, it implies
that nothing can change. The person will continue cheating and will
never apologize, and we just have to learn to cope with such monsters.
This is fixed thinking, indeed.
However, if we remember that anything is possible, we might realize
that what we really want is for the cheating person to somehow realize
that he doesn't have to cheat to get what he wants, that he will
feel so much better if he apologizes, and even that he will have wonderful
people in his life who help and support him in getting what he wants
with honesty and integrity.
Such a desire creates a future in which the cheating person gets the
help and support he needs so that he can comfortably and openly get
what he wants.
With that in mind, consider this: Would you rather create healing
and recovery for a cheating person, or would you rather create revenge?
Would you rather create the possibility of honesty and integrity for
the person, or would you rather create more anger, shame, and lack?
Hopefully you'd rather create healing and recovery! If so, remember
this example, and then practice asking yourself what you really desire
if anything in the world were possible. Ask yourself what the other
person, people, or organizations need to get their needs met. When
people get their needs met, they usually don't do mean things
to others. Think about what others want and need, and desire it for
them. What do you want and need? Desire it for yourself. And lastly,
“Plant the seed of desire in your mind,” as Robert Collier
wrote, and it will form “a nucleus with power to attract to itself
everything needed for its fulfillment.”
©
2003 by Joanne Rodasta Wilshin, MA. Joanne Rodasta Wilshin wrote Take
a Moment and Create Your Life! She facilitates MindAffects™
Workshops, and provides private MindAffects™ consultations. Contact
her at jrodasta@spiritsmith.com
or 949-759-9300.
Gifts
