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9-11:
Releasing the Rage
By
Suzanne Wright
About
a week after the terrorist attacks at the
World Trade Center, I was in the mall window-shopping.
I walked into a high-end chocolatier and stared
lasciviously at the gorgeous displays. I eyed
a truffle I hadn't seen before and inquired
about it. The clerk was a woman of about fifty
and she looked weary.
“I
don't know anything about it,” she
snapped.
I
was taken aback. Normally the staff was upbeat,
knowledgeable and glad to offer you a sample.
“May
I have a sample?”
“I'm
not allowed,” she barked.
Battle
lines were drawn.
Often
that's all the bait I have needed to launch
into an angry scene. I've worked steadily
to tame my anger dragons; it sometimes seems
like at a snail's pace. That ability to
stop, breathe and choose has improved my life
immeasurably, not to mention untold angst
it has saved shop clerks, hotel attendants,
waiters, my friends, family and partners.
People who have known me for years remind
me how much less I fly into a rage these days.
It
occurred to me to argue with her. I could
have said that in the past I've been able
to ask questions and receive informed answers.
I could have told her that it makes sense
to offer a sample to a customer who might
buy a dozen truffles. I could have said I
expected a higher level of service at this
establishment. I could have pointed out that
I was a regular customer. I could have said
I would never shop here again and would tell
all my chocoholic friends to boycott the store.
Instead,
I bit my tongue.
“You
seem upset,” I said evenly to the woman,
looking her in the eye. “I hope you feel
better. I'll come back at another time.”
As
I turned to walk away she shouted after me,
“Who cares about chocolate?”
In
light of the devastation wrought by terrorists
in New York City, Pennsylvania and Washington,
D.C., maybe she had a point. Although I'll
always care about chocolate, her outburst
got me thinking about what else collapsed
with the World Trade Center Towers, and what
has emerged, phoenix-like, during the past
few months.
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