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KG: How does the holy longing become destructive?

CZ: When we misplace our yearning for the divine onto human beings in addictive relationships, we are crushed with disappointment because we are asking another person to carry too great a burden, to fulfill a desire that can only be fulfilled within our own souls. When we misplace our longing onto substances, seeking transcendence through food, alcohol, or altered states, this false transcendence only leads to dependency and despair. Anyone who has successfully eliminated a craving for a substance finds that, beneath it, a deeper craving remains. In fact, there is a very famous letter written by the great Swiss psychologist Carl Jung to Bill Wilson, the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, that suggests the craving for “spirits” is actually a misplaced craving for the spirit.

When we place our longing onto religious teachers, priests, or gurus-imagining that transcendence can take place via an intermediary who has a special relationship to the divine-we often become discouraged and disillusioned because no one can carry the weight of our ideals. Or the result may be worse, as illustrated by the incredible things we're witnessing in the Catholic Church right now.

Finally, it is because of this holy longing that Islamic fundamentalists fight a jihad, willingly sacrificing their lives for a promised paradise. Cut off from transcendence in life, they mistake death for transcendence. The same process occurs among cult fanatics who commit group suicide to attain the other world or fundamentalist Christians who seek the rapture rather than enjoy life on earth.

KG: What is religious, or spiritual, abuse?

CZ: I define it as a mistreatment in a religious setting that results in an injury to that which is central to the soul-our faith. It's a betrayal of trust by the very people to whom we entrust our faith, those who carry a higher authority for us.

Some religious abuse is covert, such as misusing religious teachings to justify political and moral stances or implying that harm will come if a believer doubts or leaves a group. Other abuse is overt, such as the worldwide epidemic of sexual assaults by purportedly celibate Catholic clergy, the secret sexual affairs by allegedly celibate spiritual teachers in various Eastern traditions, or financial coercion of believers.

In any tradition, when a follower longs for transcendence and invests a leader with the power to give it, that leader commits religious abuse if he betrays the trust of the follower.

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