Bernadette’s Pages: An Intimate Crossroad by Bernadette Rose Smith

by Devra Ursem-Phillips

When reading Bernadette’s Pages: An Intimate Crossroad, I felt like I was eavesdropping as her husband turns their life upside down by dissolving their marriage for someone else. At a time when reality television proliferates surreal views of love and disappointment, these pages respond to a real need. Honest and raw, they travel from devastation to determination to hope to reconciliation and bring us a timely book of profound wisdom. Though non-fiction, these pages entertain like a fictional fantasy, capturing the imagination with mystical dialog, serendipitous events, and enchanted love – complete with a happy ending.

We are drawn in as the blank pages of her journal become a refuge where she rants, reflects, witnesses and scribes wisdom from a higher presence. We cry with her as she courageously explores both her heart and her soul. We cheer her on as she gains the strength to discover who she is. Often this book causes a pause, a reflection of our own, and graciously offers us space to capture the thought before it leaves us and do some growing ourselves.

In her pages, Bernadette demonstrates the technique of Spirit Dialog – asking questions of a higher spirit and truly listening for a response. This takes acquiring the ability to let go of our preconceived notions and trust completely. It is not always the response we want to hear, as she demonstrates in her journal entries. We also learn from her how important it is to record the message and decipher and absorb it later. Here is a sample of spirit dialog when she is suffering with the pain of separation. “Feel the pain but with no fear, and the lesson will take but an instant. Behold the wonders of your Father who loves you very deeply and no longer wants to witness your punishment of self or brother. You do not have to stop loving Ray. Send him love, but send yourself love also. This is about loving yourself. You have been so lost in him that there is no longer a distinction between your love and your fear.”

As she “comes to” in her pages, she also comes to in her home. After 18 years of sharing space with her husband she becomes painfully aware of what their homes have not reflected: Who she is. When her husband moves out she is confronted with half empty rooms and blank walls and realizes that every choice she ever made referenced to the needs and preferences of another. This is so true of many women today who tend to lose their own identity as they let themselves become known as their spouse’s wife and their children’s mother. Many women never take the time to rediscover themselves after their children are grown and often choose divorce as their path when they come to this same crossroad.

How many couples go through this and carry this baggage into a new relationship only to find old resentments, fear and guilt resurfacing – each deja vu threatening their fresh start? By sharing her story of recovery, Bernadette encourages us to explore ourselves along our own paths. We can’t grow in our lives without dealing with that four-letter word FEAR. In her pages Bernadette graciously offers us yet another tool: springboards for us to journal about our fears. She offers questions and thoughts that get us thinking and the space to get those fears on paper. As I read about what she was dealing with I often found my mind off in my world dealing with my stuff.
It is not a surprise to me that Bernadette’s Pages comes highly recommended by Dr. Michael Ryce, international lecturer and author of Why is this Happening to Me ... Again? with this quote, “The key to peace in the world is not justice, as many claim, but responsibility. Gain for yourself, through Bernadette’s healing process, the profound gifts responsibility gives. From Bernadette’s Pages you will learn how to gain peace and, at the same time, be making an important contribution to a peaceful world.”

I believe this book provides a “formula” that when applied to your own life will bring forth incredible insights and an opening to love and peace. Bernadette clearly demonstrates how to bring journaling to the next level. What a wonderful tool for individuals seeking inner peace and successful relationships.

Devra Ursem-Phillips, of Visions Unlimited Coaching, is dedicated to helping women realize their full potential in their lives, careers and communities. For a free consultation contact Devra at 770-784-9321.